I am paralyzed with fear.
5 I remember the days of old.
I ponder all your great works
and think about what you have done.
6 I lift my hands to you in prayer.
I thirst for you as parched land thirsts for rain.
7 Come quickly, Lord, and answer me,
for my depression deepens.
Don’t turn away from me,
or I will die.
8 Let me hear of your unfailing love each morning,
for I am trusting you.
Show me where to walk,
for I give myself to you.
9 Rescue me from my enemies, Lord;
I run to you to hide me.
10 Teach me to do your will,
for you are my God.
May your gracious Spirit lead me forward
on a firm footing.
11 For the glory of your name, O Lord, preserve my life.
Because of your faithfulness, bring me out of this distress.
12 In your unfailing love, silence all my enemies
and destroy all my foes,
for I am your servant.
Today I want to feel... I want to not be numb... I want to KNOW His presence is here and that I'm not abandoned. I feel surrounded in darkness and I'm treading water but I'm tired..... so tired. God, please....
"Holy, You are still Holy even when the darkness surrounds my life,
Sovereign, You are still sovereign even when confusion has blinded my eyes,
Lord I don't deserve Your kind affection,
my unbelief has kept me from Your touch,
I want my life to be a true reflection of Your love,
And so I come into Your chambers and I dance at Your feet, Lord
You are my Saviour and I'm at Your mercy
All that has been in my life up to now
belongs to You, for You are still holy."
Rita Springer
11 comments:
I love the Psalms...
May your protests soon turn into praise. Praying for you. HUGS!!!
THANK you... ugh, it's just been a week of despair. Thank you, thank you. Your prayers are so valued...
Song by DownHere...
From Protest To Praise
I knew the times would come and now the times have landed
With stinging abrasion As ready as I seem to be
It's never like I planned it, yeah
PRE CHORUS
I'm wrestling my thoughts I'm overcome
Would you give me up I'm asking Lord
There's no where I sense Your presence here
So I will cry out, until I go
CHORUS
From Protest to praise
You're always amazing me
You're changing me slow, but surely
And You're gonna see me to the end
How long will I be forgotten by You forever
You're not making sense here
Seems like eternity has made a home between us, yeah
PRE CHORUS/CHORUS (2X)
You're changing me slow
I just can't help but see it that way
Cuz You're gonna see me to the end
Lovely... it brought tears! Thanks Holly.
I love that song you quoted by Rita Springer.
Graham Cooke says "There are no good days and bad days with God, only days of more grace.
May you be overwhelmed with His grace. May it be a tangible presence that you can feel today.
I will be praying for you now..... thanks for being so transparent. God love your heart, broken, disappointed, despair and all.
I love David's writings......... he was real like us, one moment praising Him, the next moment, in the pit of despair.
May His fragrance ooze out of your cracks of brokenness....
love you and praying.
"Breathe on me now as I bow down
I'm desperate Lord for more of you
Come satisfy, until I am even more in need of You..."
I think this is going to be a weekend where I'm weeping while worship soaks my heart. I am just so tired... I don't want to be here. Thank you Cheryl for your prayer. I can FEEL it and I appreciate you for loving me.
I will fight for you in the Spirit.
No weapon formed against you shall prosper.
Even though He slay me, yet will I trust Him.
I wrote out a song that God gave me on my worship blog. Hope it encourages you.
Joy
Though I don't walk in your pain...
I very much understand walking in "the depths of despair..."(our beloved Anne).
I want to pray a prayer of peace over you...
Father, though Joy can not see, hear or feel you sometimes...let her take confidence in the depths of her KNOWING you. Knowing the past victories, knowing your goodness all around her, knowing that you are a GOOD and AWESOME and UNCHANGING God.
Father build Joy's Faith once again, and as you do, please speak louder, make yourself clearer, and your presence tangible to Joy.
Father hold her so close, she can hear your heart beat. As she hears your heart beat, may she be reminded that your heart is beating for her, and for her children....and that you have a plan. One she doesn't understand, or see, but one that she WILL one day look back over and smile and say...GOD, YOU TRULY WERE FAITHFUL.BOTH TO ME AND TO MY BABIES.....
Bless you Joy...it is no accident that He gave you that name. It's yours, hold on to it with whatever strength you can muster...YOU ARE JOY...YOU ARE HIS JOY!!!!
On a side note, check in on my blog over the next couple of weeks. I penned an awesome story (I can say that, because God authored it...)about a year ago. I am searching for it, and will post it when I find it...or rewrite it. It is all about God's hand of faithfulness being on my husband from his conception, adoption...and to this day in a very AWESOME...THIS CAN"T BE COINCIDENCE WAY!!!
Jen..
I have believed God chose her name from the moment I met Joy...although her birth name was different, I believe God knew that her "new name" her chosen name, was to be the one he knew her as..
She has, through all her trials and pains, been constant JOY in my life....
Good word..so glad someone else sees it.
Joy, I have read the Psalms countless times as I have walked this journey. I just checked my Bible and see that I marked Feb./05
beside the passsage that you quoted. Over two years have passed since then, and I'm still faced with huge losses BUT there have also been many blessings. There were times when I thought I may never laugh again BUT I can truthfully say that I have laughed again and again and again....
Joy, when I first visited your blog I thought about your name, the meaning of your name and the photo/verse on your layout. Joy, I pray that "The joy of the Lord shall be your strength."
Thank you Roxanne. I'm amazed how low the low points are in this journey and I know I haven't felt the worst but I DO recognize the blessings and while I still have my moments of weakness, I know that "when I'm weak, HE is strong". I believe that...
There are many times I can remember in my life where I thought my name was a curse... I still don't know the full purpose of my life and am not sure I understand yet why I was named Joy, but I have come to appreciate the fact that it's my name and the more I claim it and believe it was predestined and that JOY is a part of who I'm meant to be, I will become JOY.
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