Wednesday, March 12, 2014

A farewell to my Aunt-friend...

I can hardly recall a moment with my Aunt that I didn't cherish for so many reasons.  She was a beautiful person... cheerful and sweet, caring and thoughtful.  One of my earliest memories was prancing about her kitchen in her strappy white heels and a slip - my didn't I feel like a princess!  She really was remarkable at making you feel valued and loved.  She and I were penpals when I was 9 or 10 and we exchanged letters back and forth for several years.  I am not sure she realized how special those made me feel... that she took the time to write me and respond to letters I sent her.  Her smile and her soft eyes always seemed to invite you into an embrace, a heartfelt sharing of your life and a conversation that made you feel like you were the only one on the planet she was interested in, in that moment.  Just a few months ago, she told me that "even though I was adopted, and not 'really' a blood relative, she always thought of me as one of the family;  belonging".  I never felt anything but.   
As I've grown up, our family times at the farm have been treasured times of laughter, music and fun.  We would play games, do puzzles and play duets on the piano.  Aunty Rita would put on the loveliest of spreads - full turkey dinners, pies and desserts, meat and cheese trays, crackers, olives!  She was the best hostess!  
When Uncle Omer died, I found myself drawn to her... we spent lovely afternoons sharing lunch, talking as women... as friends.  She shared her heartaches, and drew me out of mine.  She talked to me about her hopes and dreams, and I shared mine.  We connected on a level I wouldn't have anticipated and it was a comfort to me and an unexpected blessing.  
As this past summer came to an end and autumn began, she was very ill.  I considered it a privilege to visit her every other week for several months.  She lit up when she saw me, she hugged me fiercely and cried on my shoulder.  It was not a sign of weakness to me, but a sign of deep trust and friendship that we had cultivated.  She was my friend.  I loved her dearly.  
Sunday was our last visit.  She didn't talk, and didn't open her eyes more than once.  She gripped my hands tightly, though, and I knew in my heart she knew I was there and was happy I was.  I sang, "the Lord bless you and keep you... the Lord make His face to shine upon you and be gracious, gracious, gracious to you, the Lord lift up His countenance upon you and give you, give you, give you peace".  She is at peace now.
Aunty Rita, if you never knew, I hope you know now how much you were treasured.  How much you were loved.  Your friendship to me was incredible and I will never forget our visits, your kindness, your openness and your love.  You have left a beautiful hole in my heart.  You will never be forgotten.

 

1 comment:

RETA said...

Joy - I really loved reading your beautiful story. I can relate. My mother passed away so long ago - but one of her dearest friends became my friend and mentor. She is quite fragile now and each time I see her, I wonder if I will ever see her again. I treasure our relationship. She has deposited so much in me. Your post reminds me how important it is for us to make ourselves available to others in the same way. Thank you for writing.
RETA@ http://evenhaazer.blogspot.com